Do you ever feel like a fake? Like if people ever really knew?
Like even though on the outside you’re pretty accomplished, on the inside you feel like a big giant Imposter…
I did.
I had the chance to connect with Dr. Valerie Young author of “The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women: Why Capable People Suffer from the Impostor Syndrome and How to Thrive in Spite of It.”
If you feel like an imposter a lot, this interview is for you.
Don’t miss the book giveaway!
All you have to do is post a comment below:
Have YOU ever felt like an imposter? Why?
(We’ll randomly choose one comment to win a copy of the book!)
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
I am consumed by guilt on a daily basis…if everyone knew what an idiot I am, they wouldn’t have any trust or faith in me. I’m convinced that suddenly they’ll all wake up and realize I’ve been fooling them all along, than I will lose everything…the fancy job, the nice house, the caring family…..will all vanish because I have been living a lie. Nothing I do is ever good enough for me even though they are always telling me I am doing great…but I know it’s just not good enough.
I used to think this way too. I thought I had to prove to the world my competence and intellect. Which is why I got the post grad degree. The real freedom came when I realized that the parts of me I thought were idiotic, were actually my best traits. So now I dance, and goof around as a part of my “brand.” How cool is that?!
Hi Amy and Valerie-
My favorite nuggets are:
There wouldn’t be shame if there was a “should.”
Put yourself in the role of the learner.
A sense of belonging fosters confidence
Yes, (me too:)) I have felt like an imposter because I’m not college educated. I grew up in a challenging environment and have made it to better ground. At times “being a fake” or imposter pops up. Great discussion!
Love this Dana. Thanks for sharing. I have that too. I was the first one in my family to go to college. Since I came from a family that of alcoholics that didn’t go to college I always felt I had to “make up” for it. So even though I did go to college I still felt like an imposter!
I always feel like I could or should be doing more, no matter how much I accomplish.
Hey Kirsti! Thanks for sharing. I know that feeling. It has been a long road for me to get to a point where I don’t equate my self worth with what I have or have not accomplished. The trials of a performer!
As a teacher, I was constantly comparing myself to my colleagues, comparing my students’ scores to their students’ scores. Unfortunately in education we are forced to do this. Even when my students scored equally or above I felt like an imposter. So much so that I told myself and some of my friends in education, “I am not a teacher. I am not a teacher!” Now I am taking a year out and find myself frozen. I can’t seem to move forward on any front. I need to find a job but I am so stuck in imposter mode that I can’t think of single job outside of education that I could legitimately apply for. Where do I start?
Shellly, I think you start by believing in yourself. By giving yourself permission to be YOU. Infuse your work with your YOUNESS. There is no one like you, never has been and never will be. Once you get that and you live that, you simply cannot feel like an imposter. I suggest checking out my homestudy product, be brazen in biz and life. Lots of help in there. Thanks for your post! xoxo